Osakatomebaby

I'm heading to India and one place I'll be in Madurai so I've been looking for relevant news. This is the most exciting thing I've come across thus far. Looks like Madurai's a happenin place.

Looks like going to Cambodia was actually the safe part of Justin over at waterunderground's trip. Then again, I have a hard time believing a hard-core Burning Man-goer can be in much danger anywhere.

I got irrationally peeved at a friend the other day for helping me to find her when I was lost. I'm a navigation maniac. Which is to say I wasn't really lost, just homing in. It's weird, ever since I got back to Japan it's like (and I know to say it jinxes it...knock wood) my internal GPS got switched on.

Probably it has to do with the fact that I read maps and look for landmarks more than I used to.

Actually, that rather reminds me there was an interesting piece on TAL (I think) a few years back about how men and women navigate differently. Evidently women have a greater tendency to use landmarks and men, spacial relationships. I think I lean toward the latter, which is good in Osaka. But I do, sometimes get turned around and then I have to start looking for landmarks.

I'm terrible at spacial relationships when it comes to driving, but then, I'm not the best driver ever either.

This is all the long way of saying I got lost today because I foolishly accepted the (unrequested) assistance of a stranger. I was in Shin-Tennoji with a very limited amount of time, attempting to get to the immigration bureau to get my re-entry permit in order to get my India travel visa.

I'm outside the subway station, a bit confused and looking at my map when a smart-looking businessman asks where I need to go. I barely start to say, showing the map, when he says, oh it's this way I'll take you I'm going that way anyway.

And a-waaay-we go. I'm still not oriented (no it's not a pun dork) but (a) I was told it's difficult to find and (b) I'm in a hurry so...

It's drizzling but I'm not using my umbrella because I'm a geek from Oklahoma/Texas and it never occurs to me to use it till I'm half drenched by the permeating mist. We don't have rain like this in Texas and unless there are actual raindrops, anyone who pulled out their umbrella would probably raise a few eyebrows. Can't take a little rain, eh?

So he's not talking to me, just walking and I'm walking and he's trying to keep the umbrella over both of us and I'm just looking out for henchmen wondering if this is their scheme, wait for foreign women to come out of the subway near immigration and look at their map then lead them off to the slave traders (see mom, I do listen, I just don't act on it). Of course I mostly think this to amuse myself, but I prepare to whip out some martial arts moves just in case. Ha.

And it seems to me we're both going in the wrong direction. I try to mention this once or twice without being too rude and I get a polite but mildly annoyed "I know where I'm going". So yeah, I'm looking at landmarks and wondering when I can safely make a break.

We come to a major street and he points up the road--it's two lights up and to the left. Thanks.

Two lights up and to the left I find the International House Hotel where the staff are kind enough to look at my map and point me in the right direction.

By the time I got to the Immigration Bureau I was fried and what's more, out of time. Besides being in a rather inconvenient location (an hour from where I live), the woman denies the ability to speak English. Now this is a question I never ask, to tell the truth. I would rather spend an hour misunderstanding someone in Japanese than let that first word escape my lips, but today, oh today.

I need the visa for India, I'm going skiing tomorrow and I don't even own a pair of gloves yet. I'm at immigration and I figure the woman behind the sign that reads "information" in English might, might be able to help.

So before I know what I'm doing I hear myself asking in Japanese, do you speak English? What a horror. Then before I know it random short phrases in English start interjecting themselves into my query. She does, it turns out, understand, she's just not going to play that game and I'm thinking I have to be at work in 40 minutes and it's an hour trip but I'm here so...

Sooo...say thanks, take the form, grab a better map in Japanese this time and run to the subway. I somehow magically fly through the gate and onto an already departing train, run barrels through Umeda and land on a rapid express. I sigh and turn to the David Rakoff book I'm reading in the desperate search for something more critical than me. 20 minutes later I arrive with time to buy a pastry and waltz casually into the office.

Good morning! How are you!

Great thanks! How about you!

I confess I did kvetch to my coworker about it and she pointed out that the immigration bureau in Los Angeles doesn't offer service in Japanese either.

But they should! There must be a false economy in not employing people who can actually help immigrants. And surely they offer service in Spanish, they must, right? I'm very into false economies.

Yeah, today I'm an ugly American. But that's okay, tomorrow's Groundhog day according to me because I'll be doing it all again. Hopefully I'll get it right this time.

You know the whole thing about how some people think happiness is "somewhere else". Well sometimes it's true. I am so much happier here, even when I have crappy days like today, than I ever was in Austin. Maybe I'm just more easily satisfied here, I'm not sure that's a bad thing.

Unfortunately there's another big "somewhere else" out there and I'll never be totally happy till I get to India (which I will in April). So after April I will know exactly where I'm supposed to be in the world. How about that? Then I'll just have to figure out how to get there (if it's not here), what to do there, and ultimately who (if anyone) to do so with. Well the last is a footnote if I ever get around to it I suppose...

Sci Fi Wire (of the Sci Fi Channel) reports that (I didn't know) Disney (aka ABC) bought the Muppets, and that they're remaking the Wizard of Oz for TV.

When will we learn? Maybe it's just because I'm listening to ye olde Leonard Cohen song "Everybody Knows", but yeah, everybody knows the scene is dead people. Or rather, Henson is. Only celebrity I ever cried for to memory.

The Muppets haven't done anything worthwhile since...which was later? Great Muppet Caper or Muppets Take Manhattan? Anyway, nothing ever bested The Muppet Movie, not to mention the show.

Norah, you may now do the dance. (Only Norah can do the Kermit/Fozzie dance as a live-action non-muppet human).

They were probably smart to sell to Disney, the image is so watered-down already, it's not even the same creature. Muppets used to be a great characiture of Vaudeville with the worlds greatest cameos. Even if they are funny now, remakes are never going to cut it--especially Oz. I mean why? Can we watch it to Dark Side of the Moon? I think not.

A warm welcome to an old friend, now and henceforth to be known as Sugar & Splice - Film Editing in LA. I guess that means I can call you Sugar? No? Well I guess not...

You pinged me on Friendster once upon a time, then disappeared back into the abyss. That's okay, I was glad to get the ping, and I've been known to disappear into the abyss myself.

Thanks for the old days! You always forgot to lock the window on your house, so I apologize for the times I broke in and drank your booze, but it was so good. It wasn't easy getting in though you know. That window was a good four feet off the ground and the paint made it stick. But thanks all the same.

Now I am older and wiser so I wouldn't do that anymore. Plus I don't know anyone whose window I could safely pry open...

Say, did you know that untill recently the Rare Creations web site was still out there with a picture of me? $20 to anyone who finds it. I think it's a goner.

Happy blogging! Give us the inside scoop on the DVD's.

P.S. is Raf really working in porn?

Okay, it wasn't a run. More like a "morning constitutional". And read the news before heading out, but did see two white herons, three blue, and about 60 ducks. Now definitely getting bird flu. But at least four or five old men walking dogs said "ohaiyo gozaimasu".

Look out world!

(No "I's", not as easy as it looks. Must try to do it without the obvious telegram-speak).

I use the word "I" a lot, don't I?

I didn't go to Nara. I went to Osaka and a friend and I went to LOTR ROTK. Actually before that we wandered around Namba and I felt better. After all, I am the Osakatomebaby. I love Nara, but as LOTR observed, you can't go back. I know.

Nara will always be there. Now it's time to be in Osaka, and I like Osaka. I like the people and the little nooks and crannies I know. And I like getting lost, or trying to.

Yeah, LOTR was good. But you already know that.

More than anything I think what put me back on my feet was just the long sober human contact. Seems like a long time since I sat and had a cup of coffee with someone and just chatted without having to be somewhere. Is it possible to live a lazy life with friends? Now that would be a nice place to be. Just to chill with a friend...sounds like I need to slow down.

I have a lot of rules in my quest to imitate an obsessive compulsive. I figure I'm so far from that, I should just overshoot and maybe I'll be a little more A-type. I have, at this time, about three meaningless habits and self-imposed idiosyncracies I enjoy, plus a few simple neurotic rules. One of which I guess I haven't followed through successfully of late:

When I'm tired I have to act energetic, like run up the stairs at the station two at a time, stuff like that.

When I'm in a hurry I have to meander. I'm not allowed to rush. It sneaks up on you and before you know it you're zipping through the crowd on your day off to meet a friend you're not late for yet anyway. Knowing you're not allowed to rush means you have to be on time.

That one's tougher. What I ought to do is get up at 7:00 and run. It's too nice out not to and when I do that, the rest of the day is a peice of cake. Well shoot, I'm all talk, so I'm off to set the alarm and go to bed.

I walked past a sneezing pigeon a few minutes ago. I'm probably going to die of bird flu.

It's a gorgeous day which means that I'm starting to feel a little melancholy. I'm happy all miserable winter and giddy in the sweltering heat of summer. I thrill in the autumn when everything starts to whither and die. But come spring I get melancholy. What is this strange reaction? Something to do with being fair-skinned and Irish? I could belt out a good dirge on a windy cape somewhere in bliss, but strolling under blossoms I feel my shoulders start to hunch. What do you call that? I used to get it all the time, but not in years.

Actually, at the moment I think it's probably due very specifically to th fact that the pretty weather elucidates my inability to partake in it due to pressing obligations (yet here I sit, writing). Moreso, it drives home the fact that I'm living in the concrete jungle.

Well perhaps not, there are well-kep perfectly-trimmed azalias and trees making a comeback from the over-enthusiastic pruning they suffer (branches are fully chopped off at times to maintain the look). But as I walked along, trying to think of the best way to goof off and avoid doing whatever it is that's making me melancholy, I realized I just want to be in Nara. This place is so soulless and I miss Nara. I loved it there even if it was isolated. I could just head to Nara park or walk to Nigatsudo whenever I felt like it and excape.

I know I'm going to move in Japan eventually, and it's expensive and time-consuming to commute and all, but at the moment, I'm feeling very tempted to move to Nara. It's beautiful in the spring and I like living in a tourist town off-season when the weather's cold and gloomy too. If I were in Nara today I'd be sitting by the pond like my friend Jo and I did this day long ago, eating o-bento sushi and doing nothing. As long as I'm giving the old shout-outs Joanna Karukchi (I don't even remember how to spell it, hopeless) if you're out there in the universe, I miss you too, you crazy Warab.

Jo is half-Iraqi and half-Welsh, hence Warab. Lost touch with her after I left Japan and all googling has left me with nothing. Sigh. She would have gone back to London and graduated a pharmaceutical researcher, but I don't know what happened after that, or to her family, if they were in Bagdad or London. London I would imagine but rather a complicated situation.

Oh, heck. I'm going to Nara. I can get there with enough time to say hi to some deer and watch the sun set from Nigatsudo anyway.

Friday was the closing luncheon of my free (well there is a nominal fee) city Japanese class. I thought I was going to have to make a speech, but no, it wasn't on the schedule. Alas! And my cute not gay fireman is moving to Tokyo so I may not see him again unless I have a chance next time I'm there.

So I had written this speech about how funny he is and how I just had a great old time chatting with him every week. Well I tell you what, I decided if I wrote and practiced my speech I was going to give it anyway so I did. They called him up and I got 75% through before I forgot a word, but by then it was forgivable. He pretended to cry and I pretended to whack him and it was very cute.

Then he gave me some chocolate which was white so I think it was white day chocolate. I'm pretending it was anyway.

So now I guess he's going to start charging into burning buildings for a living. How neat.

Thanks Kanamoto-san!

Takatsuki station seems to have a lot of skater kids, whereas in Ibaraki we have a very devoted crew of guitar-playing high school kids. I can see the appeal of the skaters, so young bored and disaffected. But for my money it's the musicians every time. It's so nice to leave the station to the caterwalling and sometimes rhapsodizing, if one can rhapsodize at the top of one's lungs. Just gives me such a good feeling about the world.

And today, I was dead tired but the kids were singing a Spitz song from an album my onetime student Toshio gave me many years ago. Toshio Moriwaki, are you out there somewhere? I was thinking of you...

Daily Yomiuri On-Line: "The product looks and moves like a peregrine falcon. Its speaker generates a sound that scares off wild birds. Light-emitting diodes flash in its eyes. "

Like me.

Hey Melbotis--do any of your superheros have a robot falcon? Was wonder-woman's plane an invisible falcon or amd I conflating that with some old anime?